2nd

i was an interim replacement. i was a temporary stand-in.

i learned this when i saw you making her offers in front of not just me but others who have followed the story. the kind of humiliation i should be used to by now. this shit gnaws at my head when i am alone with it. hence why i try to avoid it as much as possible.

i no longer wish for you. that version doesn't even exist. what i wish for every time i get a chance to wish is for it to make sense or for someone to explain it to me so i understand what in the name of chase hot-ass crawford happened. it's all i want. and until it happens i can't move forward. i'll be right here.